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Clean, Clear, Calm…

A couple of years back, a friend of mine asked me to "help" him run the NYC marathon. He hadn’t trained, and his plan was to enlist 5 friends to each run 5 miles with him and support him through the race. I agreed to do my part and showed up at mile 5 in Brooklyn at the appointed time. As he neared, I jumped into the sea of humanity and found a pace chugging alongside him. Despite the chill of November in New York, I quickly began to sweat out the bottle of wine and huge dinner I had the night before. I was having a blast, though – the sights, the sounds, the supporting crowds… it was incredible to be a part of that swell of energy. As we approached mile 10, though, it became clear that the appointed friend was not as punctual as I had been. Feeling good, I decided to stick with my buddy and fill the gap. I had never run 10 miles before, but what the heck. We trudged along to mile 15, where yet another recruited runner had not shown up. Breaking new ground, I agreed to keep o
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Prologue: Sadness? Fear? Guilt?

I am scared, and I’m not sure why.

Our flight for Hong Kong leaves in a few hours, and I just returned from a pre-flight run. I don’t think I even noticed the road – my mind was on family, loved ones, and the trip ahead.

Maybe it’s the growing pains Cathy and I are suffering right now. Maybe it’s guilt over so many people not having the chance to travel as I do. Maybe I miss my dog. Maybe it’s the world we live in.

My fear is not the morbid type, though. I don’t think of horrors ahead. It’s just a subtle apprehension. Maybe it’s simply missing my family at the holidays. Maybe, as my dad pointed out, it’s not having fully digested the last trip before setting off again. It’s hard to eat again when you are stuffed from the last time!

Still, these are tenuous times to travel in, and I have thought a lot about the dangers in SE Asia and the random acts of terrorism that mark our place in history.

Please know this – I will do my very best to be safe for both of us, and to avoid any and all suspicious activity. My instincts are pricked and my “spidey sense” is on full throttle.

And to my family – should anything happen (Knock wood! Knock wood!), please know that I love you all very, very much, and that you have given me nothing but goodness. Nothing but goodness. If something bad happens it is because it happened despite every instinct, muscle, synapse, and impulse in my being, and that it must, therefore, have been. What will be, will be.

I am angry to be writing this – what has happened to our world? It is a sad thing to be thinking of an epitaph, simply because you wanted to travel to distant lands, see the sights, and make new friends.

I will miss you all, and I look forward to seeing you in my thoughts and in my dreams on the road. Please make the time to drop me a note or two; it’s so nice to hear from home while away.

The adventure lies ahead. Courage is not being scared; it’s carrying on in spite of your fear.

I look forward to getting back into the travel groove, and shaking this gloom.

Man! Don’t plan any trips during the holidays! Spend it with your family! Call someone you love!! (My god, I’ve become Tony Robbins…)

We’re off. Talk to you from the road. Our itinerary is amazing. I can’t wait to see it all, and hopefully share it with you.

BEN
3:15 pm
November 30th, 2002
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